This week my son starts 1st grade. Next week my daughter and I start her 5th year homeschool lessons.
'Tis the season for Back to School.
Recently, mom and I have been discussion our philosophy of going "Back to Basics" and something came to both our minds ...
Why do we need to go back to basics? Because we stepped off the basics to begin with!
So often we get into the mindset of "oh, I can eat that" (I'm as guilty of that as anyone!) This especially happens with sleevers when we find out that we can eat things like sugar and carbs again.
Cooking for a family makes it even harder, especially for those of us smaller children. There's no secret that they NEED things, like (healthy) carbs that we don't.
There are those that will tell us to just not buy our trigger foods, but what if a trigger food is something your
child needs to carry in a lunch sack? Or if a trigger food for you is a healthy choice for an after school snack for your child?
This is something I, personally, have struggled with. Cookies, chips, crackers ... These are all trigger foods for me, but things that I keep on hand for my children for their lunches and after school snacks. Of course, I buy the "good stuff" - whole grains, no refined sugars, organic when possible, etc. BUT - a trigger food is a trigger food even without pesticides and GMO's.
In a perfect world, these things wouldn't matter. In a perfect world, I'd have self control and will-power. In a PERFECT world - I wouldn't have cravings. Sadly, this world is FAR from perfect. I do still have cravings. I do still WANT certain foods. And some days, I NEED certain foods (chocolate, anyone?).
Sometimes, WE have to "back to school" when our kids do. What that means is, we have to learn and re-learn how to feed our families so that our children can get the nutrients and macronutrients they need, while we are sticking with what we need.
For me, that means putting up reminders on sticky notes. Those reminders tell me how these foods make me feel when I eat them. Cookies, for example, make me have a HORRIBLE sugar crash. Some varieties actually give me dumping syndrome. A sticky note that simply says "SUGAR CRASH/DUMPING!!" makes me think twice about having it. Chips are another trigger food for me. I can sit down and eat half a bag of funyuns in one sitting (yep - TOTAL slider food!!)! Afterward, I feel sluggish, I have an uneasy tummy, and I get a headache from the MSG in some chip varieties. So my sticky note for that says, "TUMMY LUMPS AND MSG!" Hey. It makes sense to me!
Now I'm not saying that these foods are bad - there is really no "good" or "bad" food. Food can't control itself. I've said it before but it's worth repeating that it's not the cupcakes fault it's a cupcake. BUT these foods are not beneficial.
So, for me, back to school time means re-focusing and re-learning. Remembering that there are foods that are beneficial and foods that aren't. Focusing on protein and water, and remembering my vitamins (BIG one for me!).
How are you going "back-to-school"?
Go join our discussion in our facebook group!
Monday, August 25, 2014
Monday, August 11, 2014
What's Cookin'?
By Suzette Munson
We are visiting my youngest son, JR, and his wife, Adriane. JR is the lead cook, and he is good at it, but last night I took his role and let him play with our granddaughter Olivia. I wanted to fix a kid friendly, adult worthy meal with lots of flavor. I made "veggetti". What is that? zucchini spaghetti with 4 cheese Alfredo sauce and shrimp! Simple because I used prepared products - yes I cheated! And that is okay to do occasionally.
We keep frozen boiled shrimp in the freezer at home. Fresh zucchini is a staple also. When I pick the jarred product I look for the least sugar added (they all have some) and the protein per serving. If there is no protein then where is the cheese? I add more grated Parmesan or hard cheese to improve the sauce.
A tip on cooking the zucchini is to put the sauce in a large sauté pan and begin to heat on medium heat, add the zucchini strings and let them cook gently in the sauce. I tried boiling and straining the zucchini and it was very watery..the zucchini has lots of water in it and when it heats it releases the water. Even sautéing the zucchini before adding the sauce is a way to get some of the water out of the squash. Either way when the zucchini is tender add the frozen cooked shrimp and heat until it is warm through.
This meal is so quick and summery, even little Olivia dug in with gusto. She is not a shrimp eater but she loved the veggetti!
Sue's Zucchini Spaghetti with 4 Cheese Alfredo Sauce (the cheat method)
4 bariatric servings, 2 "normal" servings
4 bariatric servings, 2 "normal" servings
2 zucchini, washed and trimmed. Cut into spaghetti strips using a "vegetti" maker or cut into long, thin strips using a knife. If you don't want to do this, just chop your zucchini up and saute it first!
1 jar of 4 Cheese Alfredo Sauce (Jen's daughter's favorite food on the planet)
1/2 lb shrimp, peeled and deveined
1 jar of 4 Cheese Alfredo Sauce (Jen's daughter's favorite food on the planet)
1/2 lb shrimp, peeled and deveined
Heat the sauce over medium low-medium heat until just coming to a simmer. Add the zucchini and the shrimp and heat through until shrimp are cooked through (they should be pink!).
Thursday, August 7, 2014
Beneficial Eating for The Bariatric Patient
We count calories, we count protein, we count carbs, we count fat, we count sugars ... We count ... and count ... and COUNT.
Tell me, how many times did you count before your surgery? If you're anything like me, you spent YEARS counting, to no avail. Why? Because we were counting, but we weren't paying attention to WHAT we were counting. There's a HUGE nutritional difference between, say 100 calories worth of fruit and 100 calories worth of cake.
Now, we have to pay even closer attention to what we're eating. We have to be sure we're getting the nutrition we need in a small amount of food. We have to shift our thinking from just counting calories and protein to actually EATING BENEFICIALLY.
What does Eating Beneficially mean to a bariatric patient?
1. PROTEIN FIRST. We hear it ALL the time, but it's very true and VERY IMPORTANT. Your body HAS to have protein to function. For those without WLS, getting daily requirements for protein is simple and can often be achieved in one meal. Those of us with tiny tummies, however, have to be a little more conscientious. That means protein at just about every meal, and we eat it first. You should have 2-3 oz on your plate.
2. VEGGIES SECOND. ALMOST as important as protein is our vegetables. Non-starchy ones, to be exact. Squash, green beans, leafy vegetables like lettuce and spinach ... you get the idea. How much? 1/4-1/2 C per meal.
3. STARCH LAST. Starches really should be an afterthought and eaten only after you've had your meat and vegetables - and ONLY if you're still hungry. These include starchy veggies like potatoes, peas, and corn. Also included are whole grains such as whole grain breads, pastas, and brown rice. Keep these to a minimum of 1-2 T or 1 slice of bread.
4. PICK REAL FOOD OVER FAKE WHEN POSSIBLE. In other words, if you CAN get your protein from a piece of meat or fish, go for that rather than a protein drink or bar. If you MUST have a protein supplement, pick an all-natural variety that doesn't include any fillers. Whey protein is your best bet, but if you can't tolerate it, go for a good vegan variety that contains a combination of brown rice, pea, and hemp proteins.
5. EAT WHEN YOU'RE HUNGRY - STOP BEFORE YOU'RE FULL - Eating when you're hungry sounds like a no-brainer, but you'd be surprised at how many of us still have the mindset that we have to starve ourselves. Newsflash - we've had our stomachs reduced to the size and shape of either an orange or a banana. WE'RE ALREADY STARVING OURSELVES (with medical supervision). Yes, YOU HAVE TO EAT. Learn to listen to your body. You might not feel hunger like you used to (especially if you've had the sleeve), but your body will tell you when it's time to eat. Learn your hunger cues! Same goes for when you're full. We all have different full-cues. Listen to your body. Stop eating BEFORE you feel that "I'm stuffed" feeling. It's far to easy to go from 0 to slime with WLS!!
In addition to great habits, there are some amazing foods that are great to have on hand in a bariatric patients life! We've put together this Benificial Foods for the Bariatric Patient printable just for you!
Friday, August 1, 2014
I CAN Have It All ... But SHOULD I?
By Jennifer DeMoss
1 Corinthians 10:23 says (amplified version):
"All things are legitimate [permissible—and we are free to do anything we please], but not all things are helpful (expedient, profitable, and wholesome). All things are legitimate, but not all things are constructive [to character] and edifying [to spiritual life]."
I have been reading this verse for so many years, thanks to Lysa Terkeurst and her Made to Crave series. But, for some reason, it never fully clicked with me.
I've been taking this amazing nutrition and eating psychology course through my friend Audra, and each week we have a coaching call. This week, we talked about my struggles with KNOWING what to do versus IMPLEMENTING it. I know how many of you have the same issue - after all, we didn't get to our pre-surgery states by implementing healthy choices, am I right? But even now, I still have that little inner child in me that likes to throw a temper tantrum every time I give her a vegetable instead of a cupcake. So that was something I really needed to work through, and I had such a revelation from last night all the way through this morning.
Last night the revelation hit when I talked about my current state of mind. Well, my state of mind for the last few weeks. Because of the section we'd been going through in the course, I got into the mindset of, "well, I can just eat whatever I want, whenever I want!"
In other words ... I went from one extreme to another.
I like to compare this to a little kid. When mommy and daddy forbid said child from having things like sweets, what happens when they go into a room filled with sweets? They completely gorge themselves! To the point where they make themselves sick! It was like that for me.
I'd told myself for so long, "I can't have {enter food [carbs, sugar, fat] here}" that when I finally realized I CAN have it, I went completely crazy with it! So much so, that I DID make myself sick - I'd been sluggish, fatigued, had digestive issues ... So many things going on in my system. BUT I still continued to eat these foods, KNOWING the effect they had on me.
Now, that's not saying the food is BAD. It's not BAD - it's not the biscuit's fault it's a biscuit! It can't help what it is! It's also not it's fault that my body reacts badly to over-processed gluten. It can't help that. So, to say that it's a "bad food" is an unhealthy thought process. It's personifying the food. Food cannot be personified. It's not fair to the food. Food doesn't have lips - it can't defend itself. FOOD IS NOT THE ENEMY.
What IS the enemy, is denying yourself respect and love.
What IS the enemy, is denying yourself what is BENEFICIAL and only focusing on what is PERMISSIBLE.
For me, everything is permissible (including bread, pasta, rice, sugar, fat, etc...). But it's not beneficial.
What IS beneficial? Asparagus. Fresh watermelon. Broccoli with cheese sauce on the side for dipping. Grilled chicken tossed with olive oil laced with lemon and garlic. See where I'm going with this? These are ALL foods that I absolutely LOVE. I could eat them every single day and be a happy girl! But I've been so stuck in a completely different mentality, that I've been denying my body these things! How is THAT being loving and respectful to myself??
Of course, that doesn't mean that an occasional cupcake is going to kill me. It's not. In fact, the occasional cupcake is probably GOOD for me (as Sponge Bob would say, "It's good for your SOUL"). But the idea that a cupcake every single day (or multiple cupcakes, in my case) is not a healthy thought.
I think that in the Bariatric Community, we have a tendency to really focus on the "all-in/all-out" idea: where we're either all in (eating whatever we want when we want) or all out (not eating ANYTHING we love ever). Both of these mentalities aren't necessarily good ones.
Many of us do need to avoid certain foods - that's not debatable. Foods like refined and processed sugar, rich and fatty foods, carbs like bread and pasta, and lactose can be detrimental for many bariatric patients. So I'm not saying you should allow yourself to have these foods if they're going to hurt you. You need to treat them as you would any other food allergy! But it's important to know that focusing on the BENEFICIAL is so much better than focusing on the negatives!
So, think about this - what foods do you love that are beneficial? Comment below, or go visit our Facebook Group to join in the discussion!
1 Corinthians 10:23 says (amplified version):
"All things are legitimate [permissible—and we are free to do anything we please], but not all things are helpful (expedient, profitable, and wholesome). All things are legitimate, but not all things are constructive [to character] and edifying [to spiritual life]."
I have been reading this verse for so many years, thanks to Lysa Terkeurst and her Made to Crave series. But, for some reason, it never fully clicked with me.
I've been taking this amazing nutrition and eating psychology course through my friend Audra, and each week we have a coaching call. This week, we talked about my struggles with KNOWING what to do versus IMPLEMENTING it. I know how many of you have the same issue - after all, we didn't get to our pre-surgery states by implementing healthy choices, am I right? But even now, I still have that little inner child in me that likes to throw a temper tantrum every time I give her a vegetable instead of a cupcake. So that was something I really needed to work through, and I had such a revelation from last night all the way through this morning.
Last night the revelation hit when I talked about my current state of mind. Well, my state of mind for the last few weeks. Because of the section we'd been going through in the course, I got into the mindset of, "well, I can just eat whatever I want, whenever I want!"
In other words ... I went from one extreme to another.
I like to compare this to a little kid. When mommy and daddy forbid said child from having things like sweets, what happens when they go into a room filled with sweets? They completely gorge themselves! To the point where they make themselves sick! It was like that for me.
I'd told myself for so long, "I can't have {enter food [carbs, sugar, fat] here}" that when I finally realized I CAN have it, I went completely crazy with it! So much so, that I DID make myself sick - I'd been sluggish, fatigued, had digestive issues ... So many things going on in my system. BUT I still continued to eat these foods, KNOWING the effect they had on me.
Now, that's not saying the food is BAD. It's not BAD - it's not the biscuit's fault it's a biscuit! It can't help what it is! It's also not it's fault that my body reacts badly to over-processed gluten. It can't help that. So, to say that it's a "bad food" is an unhealthy thought process. It's personifying the food. Food cannot be personified. It's not fair to the food. Food doesn't have lips - it can't defend itself. FOOD IS NOT THE ENEMY.
What IS the enemy, is denying yourself respect and love.
What IS the enemy, is denying yourself what is BENEFICIAL and only focusing on what is PERMISSIBLE.
For me, everything is permissible (including bread, pasta, rice, sugar, fat, etc...). But it's not beneficial.
What IS beneficial? Asparagus. Fresh watermelon. Broccoli with cheese sauce on the side for dipping. Grilled chicken tossed with olive oil laced with lemon and garlic. See where I'm going with this? These are ALL foods that I absolutely LOVE. I could eat them every single day and be a happy girl! But I've been so stuck in a completely different mentality, that I've been denying my body these things! How is THAT being loving and respectful to myself??
Of course, that doesn't mean that an occasional cupcake is going to kill me. It's not. In fact, the occasional cupcake is probably GOOD for me (as Sponge Bob would say, "It's good for your SOUL"). But the idea that a cupcake every single day (or multiple cupcakes, in my case) is not a healthy thought.
I think that in the Bariatric Community, we have a tendency to really focus on the "all-in/all-out" idea: where we're either all in (eating whatever we want when we want) or all out (not eating ANYTHING we love ever). Both of these mentalities aren't necessarily good ones.
Many of us do need to avoid certain foods - that's not debatable. Foods like refined and processed sugar, rich and fatty foods, carbs like bread and pasta, and lactose can be detrimental for many bariatric patients. So I'm not saying you should allow yourself to have these foods if they're going to hurt you. You need to treat them as you would any other food allergy! But it's important to know that focusing on the BENEFICIAL is so much better than focusing on the negatives!
So, think about this - what foods do you love that are beneficial? Comment below, or go visit our Facebook Group to join in the discussion!
Wednesday, July 30, 2014
Getting Back on Track: Why Is It So Hard?
By
Jennifer DeMoss
I've been struggling with something.
REALLY struggling.
See, I have a little problem.
Like many of you, I am a food addict.
That means that, unlike others of you that might be reading this who don't have this issue, I do not have a healthy relationship with food.
Food and I go waaaay back.
So, when I had to "give it up" prior to my surgery, I had a little bit of a mental and emotional breakdown.
Come to think of it, I've had several over the last few years.
When the weight loss was happening, it was so much easier.
The first 80-90 lbs was a breeze. Literally.
I COULDN'T eat certain things like bread or rice or pasta, so the weight just slid off me.
But when I discovered that I could eat all of those things again, my easy weight loss flew away.
From the moment I started putting those foods back into my body, my weight stalled out.
Some might say, since it's been so long, that I am now in "maintenance phase".
But, to be honest, I don't WANT to be in maintenance.
Don't get me wrong, I like where I am now. I'm currently healthier than I have ever been in my life. I am able to do things physically that I've never been before.
But WHY am I content where I am?
I'm still not as healthy as I could be.
I'm still not eating as well as I SHOULD be.
I am going through physical and emotional changes that I never expected to have to go through right now. Physically, I'm not feeling great, to be honest. I'm tired a lot, achy a lot, and have digestive issues. Sound familiar? For those that have read a few of my past posts you'll see where I talk about gluten intolerance and sensitivities. Guess what I've been eating a ton of lately? Yep. Gluten. In the form of pancakes, waffles, biscuits, bread, crackers, tortillas ... Not to mention the additives and preservatives in the processed foods I've been eating.
Emotionally, I'm dealing with the prospect of my children going back to school, and I'm also trying to figure out how to handle a special needs child that's about to hit early puberty.
The thing is, I know for a fact that eating healthy will help me with all of these issues. I'll feel better, I'll have more energy, I'll be better able to handle emotional issues ...
But I just don't.
WHY??
WHY is it so hard to do this?
The answer - at least in my case - is so, so simple.
A D D I C T I O N
How many drug users go back to using? How many alcoholics go back to the bar? How many smokers go back to a pack a day habit?
Food is no different.
But unlike some of the above addictions, food does not have a rehab center.
THIS is why support groups for bariatric patients are SO important!
We also need that addiction support and we need mentors that have been there.
I want to encourage you all today, if you have not found a support group, to PLEASE go find one. If there are none in your area, I encourage you to look into starting one!
On a final note, in the next couple of weeks, we will be holding our first 14-Day "Back to Basics" challenge. This challenge is intended to help those of us that have gone off track to get back where we need to be! I know this will help me a lot, and I hope that it will be helpful to all of you as well!
God Bless!!
Jennifer DeMoss
I've been struggling with something.
REALLY struggling.
See, I have a little problem.
Like many of you, I am a food addict.
That means that, unlike others of you that might be reading this who don't have this issue, I do not have a healthy relationship with food.
Food and I go waaaay back.
So, when I had to "give it up" prior to my surgery, I had a little bit of a mental and emotional breakdown.
Come to think of it, I've had several over the last few years.
When the weight loss was happening, it was so much easier.
The first 80-90 lbs was a breeze. Literally.
I COULDN'T eat certain things like bread or rice or pasta, so the weight just slid off me.
But when I discovered that I could eat all of those things again, my easy weight loss flew away.
From the moment I started putting those foods back into my body, my weight stalled out.
Some might say, since it's been so long, that I am now in "maintenance phase".
But, to be honest, I don't WANT to be in maintenance.
Don't get me wrong, I like where I am now. I'm currently healthier than I have ever been in my life. I am able to do things physically that I've never been before.
But WHY am I content where I am?
I'm still not as healthy as I could be.
I'm still not eating as well as I SHOULD be.
I am going through physical and emotional changes that I never expected to have to go through right now. Physically, I'm not feeling great, to be honest. I'm tired a lot, achy a lot, and have digestive issues. Sound familiar? For those that have read a few of my past posts you'll see where I talk about gluten intolerance and sensitivities. Guess what I've been eating a ton of lately? Yep. Gluten. In the form of pancakes, waffles, biscuits, bread, crackers, tortillas ... Not to mention the additives and preservatives in the processed foods I've been eating.
Emotionally, I'm dealing with the prospect of my children going back to school, and I'm also trying to figure out how to handle a special needs child that's about to hit early puberty.
The thing is, I know for a fact that eating healthy will help me with all of these issues. I'll feel better, I'll have more energy, I'll be better able to handle emotional issues ...
But I just don't.
WHY??
WHY is it so hard to do this?
The answer - at least in my case - is so, so simple.
A D D I C T I O N
How many drug users go back to using? How many alcoholics go back to the bar? How many smokers go back to a pack a day habit?
Food is no different.
But unlike some of the above addictions, food does not have a rehab center.
THIS is why support groups for bariatric patients are SO important!
We also need that addiction support and we need mentors that have been there.
I want to encourage you all today, if you have not found a support group, to PLEASE go find one. If there are none in your area, I encourage you to look into starting one!
On a final note, in the next couple of weeks, we will be holding our first 14-Day "Back to Basics" challenge. This challenge is intended to help those of us that have gone off track to get back where we need to be! I know this will help me a lot, and I hope that it will be helpful to all of you as well!
God Bless!!
Monday, July 28, 2014
Why a Support Group?
This week we were privileged to meet some really nice ladies that shared their experiences and questions with us. One was still in the hospital having just had surgery. The another was a few weeks out from surgery and was just beginning to experience solid food.
One of the overall patterns that Jennifer and I noticed was the look of abject fear on one person’s face when they asked about eating bread and noodles. Her question was why was bread hard to swallow. Bread is hard to swallow because it is a sponge and attracts all the liquid in your stomach and becomes a lump that is hard to digest! That is why bread is one of the last foods you should try to eat after surgery.
Obviously, in her pre-surgery class this was not covered. The next question was about eating noodle soup. My question to her was “Why”? Why, if you chose to have the surgery to lose unwanted weight would you revert immediately to eating the comfort food that got you obese to start with? Well, I wasn't quite that blunt, but really, Why!
The pre-surgery class I went through was about 30 minutes of discussion, a video of the surgery, and a large packet of information to read prior to the surgery.
Folks, this is a huge decision to make and a huge surgery with huge change in lifestyle and thought process. It should not have an hour of limited information. When my Dad had knee surgery he had a three hour class on the replacement surgery. I don’t think our surgeons realize that bariatric surgery is much more life changing that knee replacement. Hey, they are removing my best friend, it has helped me through stress, pain, and grief. Why doesn’t the removal of ¾ of my stomach need as much attention as the replacement of a knee joint????
This is the reason pre-surgery classes are so important and in lieu of not having that: Support Groups help get you through the realization that you can’t go back, you can only go forward and to do that you need good positive information on how to eat and live with your new stomach.
Support groups should be there for positive answers to your questions.
They should always be moderated by someone who has been through the surgery and if possible someone who is a medical professional. An office manager does not meet that requirement! There should never be food offered. It is not a party, we are not there to eat, we are there to learn.
The best support group I have ever attended met all those requirements. There are support groups going on somewhere every night. I know in the Dallas Fort Worth Area where we live there are at least 7 that take place every month. Because we are weak humans we need the support to help us learn new techniques and recipes for controlling our appetite. I have through the years met people who needed help on a weekly and even a daily basis to get through the first 6 months after their surgeries. This is completely okay! We are relearning habits that we have had all our lives. And most of us are old enough that retraining needs repetitive learning to stick.
Another issue that came to light is the Psychological evaluation. The insurance companies require that we have the evaluation so that we understand the ramifications of the surgery.
In other words they are covering themselves by saying you answered all the questions and are completely able to understand the process of the surgery. What they don’t take into consideration is that we are long term obese people who have worked hard to become large overweight people. We eat because of many issues. These issues are not addressed.
Now I am not saying that we need long term psychological analysis. I just think we need a little more than filling out a sheet of paper telling the councilor how many diets we have been on and how much weight we have gained or lost in the last 2-5 years. To me this visit was a one shot, very unsatisfying and really the counselor I met with really had to clue what the long term changes were going to happen to my body and mind. The counselor that Jennifer met with was much more informed and was the person that gave us the idea for “7 Bites” so I know that there are good counselors out there but they are not the norm, they are few and far between.
I believe that the support group is the place where we counsel each other in a non threatening environment with lots of love and support for each other. This is why support groups are so important for us recovering foodaholics.
The last issue that I recognized is that many people pay cash for their surgeries and travel across state lines or on airplanes to get to their bariatric surgeons. This is hard on the patient and can be very frustrating for the hospital staff as traveling immediately after surgery can
have serious complications. This is another issue that because of distance is very difficult for the patient to plug into a good support system.
A lot of the surgeons have online support groups and I for one don’t believe that online support should ever take the place of face to face support. For those that travel long distances this sounds like a good way to keep informed and may help but is not the best way to get personal support.
I have seen too many of these support groups become “gripe sessions” and without face to face interaction the posts often are left unanswered. There is no support it is only a place to make arbitrary statements, get a thousand answers that may or may not really answer your questions.
Meeting face to face we can see the frustration, feel the pain, and give a hug to help others know that we have walked in their shoes. We have felt the things and gone through the steps that they will go through.
I really feel that by plugging into the support group closest to you that success with your surgery is so much more within your reach. The members of your support group will interact with you on your level and allow you to see their failures and success.
An old saying I love is: A wise man learns from the mistakes of others
And we all want to be wise and learn what it takes to become successful in our new lives with our new bodies.
If you are not able to plug into a face to face support group plug in to our facebook page Official 7Bites Group Jennifer and I monitor it daily and will do our best to get answers to your questions and if we don’t know the answer we will find someone who does. We are not ever going to take the place of a face to face support system but we can supplement and build some fun online friendships.
One of the overall patterns that Jennifer and I noticed was the look of abject fear on one person’s face when they asked about eating bread and noodles. Her question was why was bread hard to swallow. Bread is hard to swallow because it is a sponge and attracts all the liquid in your stomach and becomes a lump that is hard to digest! That is why bread is one of the last foods you should try to eat after surgery.
Obviously, in her pre-surgery class this was not covered. The next question was about eating noodle soup. My question to her was “Why”? Why, if you chose to have the surgery to lose unwanted weight would you revert immediately to eating the comfort food that got you obese to start with? Well, I wasn't quite that blunt, but really, Why!
The pre-surgery class I went through was about 30 minutes of discussion, a video of the surgery, and a large packet of information to read prior to the surgery.
Folks, this is a huge decision to make and a huge surgery with huge change in lifestyle and thought process. It should not have an hour of limited information. When my Dad had knee surgery he had a three hour class on the replacement surgery. I don’t think our surgeons realize that bariatric surgery is much more life changing that knee replacement. Hey, they are removing my best friend, it has helped me through stress, pain, and grief. Why doesn’t the removal of ¾ of my stomach need as much attention as the replacement of a knee joint????
This is the reason pre-surgery classes are so important and in lieu of not having that: Support Groups help get you through the realization that you can’t go back, you can only go forward and to do that you need good positive information on how to eat and live with your new stomach.
Support groups should be there for positive answers to your questions.
They should always be moderated by someone who has been through the surgery and if possible someone who is a medical professional. An office manager does not meet that requirement! There should never be food offered. It is not a party, we are not there to eat, we are there to learn.
The best support group I have ever attended met all those requirements. There are support groups going on somewhere every night. I know in the Dallas Fort Worth Area where we live there are at least 7 that take place every month. Because we are weak humans we need the support to help us learn new techniques and recipes for controlling our appetite. I have through the years met people who needed help on a weekly and even a daily basis to get through the first 6 months after their surgeries. This is completely okay! We are relearning habits that we have had all our lives. And most of us are old enough that retraining needs repetitive learning to stick.
Another issue that came to light is the Psychological evaluation. The insurance companies require that we have the evaluation so that we understand the ramifications of the surgery.
In other words they are covering themselves by saying you answered all the questions and are completely able to understand the process of the surgery. What they don’t take into consideration is that we are long term obese people who have worked hard to become large overweight people. We eat because of many issues. These issues are not addressed.
Now I am not saying that we need long term psychological analysis. I just think we need a little more than filling out a sheet of paper telling the councilor how many diets we have been on and how much weight we have gained or lost in the last 2-5 years. To me this visit was a one shot, very unsatisfying and really the counselor I met with really had to clue what the long term changes were going to happen to my body and mind. The counselor that Jennifer met with was much more informed and was the person that gave us the idea for “7 Bites” so I know that there are good counselors out there but they are not the norm, they are few and far between.
I believe that the support group is the place where we counsel each other in a non threatening environment with lots of love and support for each other. This is why support groups are so important for us recovering foodaholics.
The last issue that I recognized is that many people pay cash for their surgeries and travel across state lines or on airplanes to get to their bariatric surgeons. This is hard on the patient and can be very frustrating for the hospital staff as traveling immediately after surgery can
have serious complications. This is another issue that because of distance is very difficult for the patient to plug into a good support system.
A lot of the surgeons have online support groups and I for one don’t believe that online support should ever take the place of face to face support. For those that travel long distances this sounds like a good way to keep informed and may help but is not the best way to get personal support.
I have seen too many of these support groups become “gripe sessions” and without face to face interaction the posts often are left unanswered. There is no support it is only a place to make arbitrary statements, get a thousand answers that may or may not really answer your questions.
Meeting face to face we can see the frustration, feel the pain, and give a hug to help others know that we have walked in their shoes. We have felt the things and gone through the steps that they will go through.
I really feel that by plugging into the support group closest to you that success with your surgery is so much more within your reach. The members of your support group will interact with you on your level and allow you to see their failures and success.
An old saying I love is: A wise man learns from the mistakes of others
And we all want to be wise and learn what it takes to become successful in our new lives with our new bodies.
If you are not able to plug into a face to face support group plug in to our facebook page Official 7Bites Group Jennifer and I monitor it daily and will do our best to get answers to your questions and if we don’t know the answer we will find someone who does. We are not ever going to take the place of a face to face support system but we can supplement and build some fun online friendships.
Monday, July 21, 2014
Life Changing Events
Usually when we think of life changing events we think of births, death, marriage, or divorce just to name a few. Last week we celebrated a life changing event for my beautiful daughter, Jennifer DeMoss. Yes, having weight loss surgery is one of the biggest life changing events that either of us have gone through since her birth.
Thinking of surgery as such a big event can only be understood by someone who has undergone this kind of event. It is the end of a lifetime of being inside a body that is not in our control.
In my personal life, I always wonder if after being sick for a year and gaining 20-30 pounds as a 10 year old child what would have happened if I had not been put on that first diet? What would have been different in my life? Would I have become the yo-yo dieter of a lifetime? Or would my body have healed itself and possibly as my activity level got back to normal so would my weight?
Don’t know and never will, but looking at where my daughter was before her weight loss surgery, I think that her weight problem may have been a residual from my weight problem.
Genetics, maybe? We come from a long family line of hard working farm families. None of which were considered overweight until in their 50-60 when they began to slow down on their activities on the farm. I grew up working in the field alongside my Mother and Dad. When my Mother passed away at age 52 she was 5”10’ in height and 182 pounds. Only about 25 pounds overweight. My Dad was 6”1’ and was 178 at 82 when he passed. He was never more than twenty pounds heavier in his whole life and he ate bread and ice cream at every meal with a coke and snickers bar for breakfast. Why were they so able to maintain their weight? Genetics? Or could it have been really simpler. No fast food on a regular basis, no boxed food items, no added salt or hidden additives in 90% of the food they ate?
I am one that truly believes our environment is a huge factor. My Dad walked miles of peanut rows and watermelon fields. He rode a tractor that bounced and bumped for hours. I, on the other hand, worked in an office and sat at a desk for hours. My exercise was doing laundry in a machine, cleaning house, and chasing children in the few hours before their bedtime. And sporadic rounds of going to the gym. I gained 26 pounds with my first child, 10 with each of the other two so I can’t say that childbirth was really a problem. I always joked that being a good cook was my downfall. Maybe it was, but now that I look at cooking I realize that the information I had was working against me - not the fact that I was cooking good meals.
The information I am talking about is the information that we have been taught for years about eating lots of carbohydrates and less fat and meat. Isn't it amazing that now we are learning that fat is not necessarily the bad food we were taught? And that so many of the processed carbohydrates we were taught that were okay, we are finding they are not really as good as we thought.
If I had ate and taught my children early on to eat like my parents I know we would have not had to have this life changing surgery.
My parents ate out of the garden, they ate beef, pork, chicken, and fish, they fried their food and ate bread, biscuits and gravy! They worked hard and burned the calories and carbohydrates. I find it interesting that the beans I grew to hate as a child are now prominent in my diet. The butter I gave up in 1970 is now a food I can eat without worrying about my cholesterol. Granted the portions I eat are now more normal portions than ever before. You see I think I fed the problem by eating the wrong things and craving more food because I was not feeding my body, I was eating…….just about anything that would fit in my mouth!
These are the thoughts that have been going through my mind as we celebrate this wonderful occasion. We have both changed our bodies and are working on changing our minds. We have learned to let the kids eat when they are hungry but provide food that is not “filler” but nutritious meals and snacks. We have learned that balanced diet does not mean something from every food group at every meal. And that balanced, for me in my diet, might not meet the needs of the rest of the family. And that this is OKAY.
Thank the Lord that he has given the medical community the tools to help us who have struggled with our bodies and have had to live with the discrimination, pain, anger, and disgust that has surrounded us for so long. Thank the Lord for this wonderful day and age when we can become in control of our bodies and minds and do great things for others with our new found freedom. Thank the Lord lastly for families that have supported us in this life changing event and pray that we continue to pass on to others the positive thoughts and prayers for success with their surgeries.
I hope all of you reading this find peace in knowing that your path has been trod by many others and we hope we can help you through any of your struggles with weight loss surgery. And for those of you reading this that may not have had surgery but are struggling to lose weight by portion control and nutritional changes I hope we can give you encouragement also because you may not have our “tool” but the mind changes are the same for any weight loss lifestyle change.
Last I want to congratulate any that are at their surgiversary (Jen's was on the 11th! 2 Years!!). You are just at the beginning of a new wonderful life as a person in control of your body and mind!
Thinking of surgery as such a big event can only be understood by someone who has undergone this kind of event. It is the end of a lifetime of being inside a body that is not in our control.
In my personal life, I always wonder if after being sick for a year and gaining 20-30 pounds as a 10 year old child what would have happened if I had not been put on that first diet? What would have been different in my life? Would I have become the yo-yo dieter of a lifetime? Or would my body have healed itself and possibly as my activity level got back to normal so would my weight?
Don’t know and never will, but looking at where my daughter was before her weight loss surgery, I think that her weight problem may have been a residual from my weight problem.
Genetics, maybe? We come from a long family line of hard working farm families. None of which were considered overweight until in their 50-60 when they began to slow down on their activities on the farm. I grew up working in the field alongside my Mother and Dad. When my Mother passed away at age 52 she was 5”10’ in height and 182 pounds. Only about 25 pounds overweight. My Dad was 6”1’ and was 178 at 82 when he passed. He was never more than twenty pounds heavier in his whole life and he ate bread and ice cream at every meal with a coke and snickers bar for breakfast. Why were they so able to maintain their weight? Genetics? Or could it have been really simpler. No fast food on a regular basis, no boxed food items, no added salt or hidden additives in 90% of the food they ate?
I am one that truly believes our environment is a huge factor. My Dad walked miles of peanut rows and watermelon fields. He rode a tractor that bounced and bumped for hours. I, on the other hand, worked in an office and sat at a desk for hours. My exercise was doing laundry in a machine, cleaning house, and chasing children in the few hours before their bedtime. And sporadic rounds of going to the gym. I gained 26 pounds with my first child, 10 with each of the other two so I can’t say that childbirth was really a problem. I always joked that being a good cook was my downfall. Maybe it was, but now that I look at cooking I realize that the information I had was working against me - not the fact that I was cooking good meals.
The information I am talking about is the information that we have been taught for years about eating lots of carbohydrates and less fat and meat. Isn't it amazing that now we are learning that fat is not necessarily the bad food we were taught? And that so many of the processed carbohydrates we were taught that were okay, we are finding they are not really as good as we thought.
If I had ate and taught my children early on to eat like my parents I know we would have not had to have this life changing surgery.
My parents ate out of the garden, they ate beef, pork, chicken, and fish, they fried their food and ate bread, biscuits and gravy! They worked hard and burned the calories and carbohydrates. I find it interesting that the beans I grew to hate as a child are now prominent in my diet. The butter I gave up in 1970 is now a food I can eat without worrying about my cholesterol. Granted the portions I eat are now more normal portions than ever before. You see I think I fed the problem by eating the wrong things and craving more food because I was not feeding my body, I was eating…….just about anything that would fit in my mouth!
These are the thoughts that have been going through my mind as we celebrate this wonderful occasion. We have both changed our bodies and are working on changing our minds. We have learned to let the kids eat when they are hungry but provide food that is not “filler” but nutritious meals and snacks. We have learned that balanced diet does not mean something from every food group at every meal. And that balanced, for me in my diet, might not meet the needs of the rest of the family. And that this is OKAY.
Thank the Lord that he has given the medical community the tools to help us who have struggled with our bodies and have had to live with the discrimination, pain, anger, and disgust that has surrounded us for so long. Thank the Lord for this wonderful day and age when we can become in control of our bodies and minds and do great things for others with our new found freedom. Thank the Lord lastly for families that have supported us in this life changing event and pray that we continue to pass on to others the positive thoughts and prayers for success with their surgeries.
I hope all of you reading this find peace in knowing that your path has been trod by many others and we hope we can help you through any of your struggles with weight loss surgery. And for those of you reading this that may not have had surgery but are struggling to lose weight by portion control and nutritional changes I hope we can give you encouragement also because you may not have our “tool” but the mind changes are the same for any weight loss lifestyle change.
Last I want to congratulate any that are at their surgiversary (Jen's was on the 11th! 2 Years!!). You are just at the beginning of a new wonderful life as a person in control of your body and mind!
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